As the year comes to a close, it ushers us into a time of holiday celebrations and anticipation for the new year. And after this crazy year we’ve had, I know we look forward with hope for a better year. But before we rush into making goals and plans for the new year, a time of reflection and evaluation is beneficial.
During evaluations and reflections we tend to focus on meeting accomplishments that are determined by someone else. It starts at the very beginning of life as expectations of meeting certain milestones like walking and sleeping through the night by certain ages are imposed on us. I’ve already been bombarded by this reality with Harper as her Down syndrome diagnosis impacts her development.
Leaving behind a typical timeline
When Harper’s evaluation report came home from preschool, I was actually initially excited to see what her teachers wrote. The comments were exactly as I expected sharing their love for Harper being in the classroom. But the list of “not yet observed” milestones was a blaring reminder that her report cards and evaluations will always look like this. She will always be “behind” her peers based on these reports.
But Harper isn’t behind. She is on her own beautiful timeline and she brings so much to this world. What’s wrong is the measuring stick that we keep trying to use. When we try to impose another timeline on her, it just leaves us disheartened. Embracing her timeline liberates us from comparison and disappointments.
It’s all about growth
And I think this is a lesson we all can benefit from! Embracing your timeline allows you to focus on your strengths and what’s best for you. For some people it might look like giving yourself more time to complete a goal and others it might look like an accelerated path. But when you commit to a realistic timeline it reframes your goals. In Harper’s case, it’s a slower pace that she travels through life on. And she isn’t the least bit worried about her timeline. She lives her best life everyday. But once we released ourselves from the social pressures to meet a typical developing timeline we were free to see the perks and joys of Harper’s timeline.
There is a place for measuring and taking stock on milestones, goals and accomplishments. Evaluations and reflection are important for growth. But when we impose the same standards on everyone this just doesn’t let most of us grow to our true potential. We can also be so easily persuaded to force ourselves to measure against standards that might not even mean anything to us.
Reevaluating your timeline
Often we focus a lot on defining goals, but forget to think about the time it takes to reach it. So, if you find yourself disappointed and failing to meet a goal year after year, maybe the problem isn’t with the goal. Maybe it’s with the timeline.
So, as we move into a new year let’s not just think about the goals we want to set, but the timeline as well. Here are some questions to think through:
- What is my goal?
- Why is this goal important to me?
- What are my current circumstances that will impact meeting the goal?
- How will specific challenges or roadblocks make it harder to meet the goal?
- What are your strengths and giftings that will help you reach the goal?
- Do I need to allow myself more or less time to meet this goal?
Let’s take a page out of Harper’s playbook and embrace our timelines!
Interested in learning more about embracing your timeline and understanding your priorities? I put together this quick, fun quiz to reveal your top priority and get clarity on what matters most to you. Take the quiz now!
